Teacher: If you have 10 chocolate cakes and someone asks for 2, how many do you have left?
Teacher: Okay, well what if somebody forcibly takes two of the cakes, how many would you have left then?
Me: 10 and a dead body.
phlynn: tumblr blue is pretty dull and depressing its the colour of lost dreams and teenage disappointment
ofprongs: lliampayne: why would you stop eating oreos because they support gay rights thats like refusing to drink water because terrorists drink water what terrorists drink water shit I’m going off that stuff now
sh4ne: what’s the difference between one direction and british flags? an L
How do you make holy water?
Take ordinary water and boil the hell out of it. This is the best joke.
c0rrupted-lungs: I just want to punch a few more holes in my walls and let my knuckles bleed. I’m either extremely depressed, extremely angry, or on a high.
I can forgive thing said in anger, but sometimes - when it’s really late at...– Need to get something off your chest ? Submit it anonymously here (via dont-tell-anyone-but)
Things I've learned the hard way:
iusemyhands: Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die. ~Malachy McCourt When you speak in anger or annoyance, in rudeness or sharpness, you’re spitting poison and knives at others. Well done, because you’ve wounded them. But be careful, because you had to put the poison and knives in your own mouth first. Read More the kind of things that goes with my...